The truth is I've always been behind the camera making records of not only their milestones, and the important events in their lives but even the non-events which all eventually became memories... captured on film. And the sad truth is, as much as I had wanted to be in the pictures, nobody offered to take my place behind the lens. I remember having to set the timer in order to take a picture with Dottie and Sonny when they were little.
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| Old-style selfie |
By then I had stopped asking Mr Hubby to take pictures of me with the kids. I knew what his response would be: I don't know how (to use the camera). It had always been like that... I don't know how.
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| Picture is blur and my head is missing! |
On one occasion we were on a trip to the mountain. After taking several shots of the kids together with Mr Hubby, I handed the camera to him telling him to just point and shoot... no fiddling with anything, I said. The camera was ready: light, speed, distance. All he needed to do was hold the camera steady, look through the view-finder and gently press the shutter button. It was foolproof. Even a child could do it if he was strong enough to carry my ancient, 'heavy' camera. I'd have a good shot of me with the kids to keep in the family album, I thought.
Alas, it was not to be.
I knew what he had done only when I got the prints from the kedai gambar. He had turned the lens all the way until the kids and I were zoomed out into the distance. We appeared hardly bigger than ants. Dear reader, I had wanted a picture showing me with the kids against a background of mountains and greenery, not a picture of nature with tiny ants crawling on a rock. I was sad, disappointed and upset but there was nothing I could do except bit my tongue.
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| What can I say? |
On another trip when the kids were a few years older, I asked him to take a picture of us and gave him the camera after making all the necessary adjustments. He took a picture and successfully put us into one corner while the rest of the photo was a whole jungle.
Now there's a grandkid, history is repeating itself. I've taken countless pictures of Mr Hubby with the kid, sometimes with him in the know, other times he was unaware and a few times he purposely planted himself in the pictures. But never once did he offer to take a picture of me with the kid or even thought that maybe I'd like to have a picture taken with my grand-daughter.
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| At the Zoo during a visit to KL |
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| Sonny is one-year old |
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| On the way to the Mountain |
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| At Kinabalu Park |
So the child will grow up to discover that while KungKung has been a big part of her childhood, Nana must have gone gallivanting, doing her own thing and didn't care enough to make time for her. Now that he owns a phone camera, it saddens me that I have to say: "Take a picture!" whenever there are 'picture-worthy' moments. And when he does take any photos, naturally, I'm never in them.
Apparently, many mothers are just like me... according to this article I read recently (which led me to think about my own situation.) They're missing from their kids' photos because of their husbands' apathy. So if you are a father and are guilty of not taking pictures of your wife with her kids, do something!
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